We’re no strangers to things going horribly wrong. In fact, our travels end in disaster more often than not. These were our worst travel fails of 2016!
We’re sitting in a restaurant in Aguas Calientes. Around us are five couples, two solo travelers, and two tour guides. All fourteen of them are tired, dirty, and covered in dried sweat. They just finished the 4-day Inca Trail to Machu Picchu and experienced a life changing experience, one that brought them together as a family to experience a once in a lifetime physical and mental challenge. As we watch them drinking celebratory beer, retelling stories, and soaking it all in, I’m reminded: this was supposed to be us. But instead of having a spiritual pilgrimage to Machu Picchu, we had an expensive failure on the Inca Trail.
The Quilotoa Loop is a 3-day long hike in the Andes mountains in Ecuador, peaking at 12,500 feet. We thought we were taking the “easy” route. It turns out there is no easy route. Of course, we didn’t know that until after getting lost twice, crawling up a mountain on our hands and knees, and chasing off several aggressive dogs….
With an extra week to kill in Cartagena, a day trip to take a mud bath in a dormant volcano sounded exciting and unique. Little did we know that our relaxing spa day would be foiled by an oil slick, vengeful abuelas, and Brazilian Dadbutt.
“How do I stop?? How do I make it stop going down?!?” I shriek frantically at my husband, who is calmly dangling in mid-air a few feet below me. I can’t make out his response through the roaring, cascading waterfall that we are both being drenched in as we rappel down a sheer rock face 250 feet in the air, but it’s probably something like ” Use the rope, idiot!” Oh, right.